Developing a growth mindset

Developing a Growth Mindset doesn’t have to be complicated, even in the midst of a global health crisis.

Let’s be real for a moment… and put things into perspective…

Do you honestly believe that you’ll never progress or accomplish anything new in your career or life?

EVER?!?!

LIKE, FOREVER EVER, AMEN!!

Does that sound right to you?

Are you listening to your Inner Critic (mine is called “The Diva” or “Little Miss Nut Nut”) asking you “Who are you to do that and where will you find the time?”

Or accepting her audacity to tell you “You are going to embarrass yourself and you should stick to what you know”.

Or maybe you ask yourself “What will other people think of me?” or “It’s inevitable that I’m going to fail”.

Do you really believe what she asks and tells you?

Most importantly, do you believe what you tell yourself?

Like, really?

If you’re now thinking NO, I don’t believe the Diva and of course, I will accomplish new things in life and progress in my career.

Then you, you have a growth mindset, it’s just about tapping into your awareness of your thoughts and aligning your actions.

If you answered yes, you truly believe that nothing will ever be better than it is right now, let’s have a look at what could be holding you back and get you focused on the bigger picture. Let’s start developing a growth mindset.

Overthinking

The same old thinking will always yield the same old results.

What do you keep telling yourself?

It was said: “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit”.

When your mind circles around with the same old thoughts over and over again, it’s hard to near impossible to disengage from them.

Which, let’s face it, is tiring, exhausting and can even leave you feeling stressed and anxious.

I’ve been there…

In order to overcome your thoughts, you need to first identify them.

It sounds simple but being aware of our thoughts can help put Little Miss Nut Nut in her place because most of the time, we don’t know we’re overthinking because it’s so automatic.

Ask yourself the right questions.

Asking yourself “Why am I overthinking?” over and over isn’t going to identify what’s really happening.

It’s only going to piss you off, frustrate the hell out of you, make you think more, then feel bad for thinking about overthinking.

Oh my goodness… why do we do this to ourselves! lol

Focusing on the solution and asking yourself questions that are proactive and positive rather than triggering will gift you the power to catch yourself when you start telling yourself these negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones.

Reclaim your thoughts to re-focus on what is most important to you.

Ask yourself the right questions:

  • What are the FACTS to back up my thoughts?
  • Do these thoughts energise me or drain me?
  • Do these thoughts empower me or hold me back?
  • What else can I do that’s a better use of my time?

Your thoughts aren’t facts, they just aren’t!

Replace “failing” with “feedback”

When you make a mistake or fall short of a goal, you haven’t failed, you’ve learned SOMETHING!

You didn’t walk on your first attempt as a child and you most certainly didn’t give a shit about who saw you fall on your ass over and over.

Actually, when you think about it, all attempts to walk (and even failing to walk) were celebrated. What’s changed?

You learnt to feel bad about not succeeding on your first attempt. ADULTHOOD – I rebuke you! lol

When you acknowledge and accept your misstep, it frees up your energy to refocus on the next steps

Failing is not bad, come on, say it with me.

FAILING IS NOT BAD!!!

I promise you, you can unlearn it and reframe it to REMEMBER it as learning.

It’s is an opportunity for personal growth and learning.

I still struggle with the down dog position but I’m not giving up on my outrageously tight hamstrings.

Ask yourself the right questions:

  • What have I learnt from this experience/working on this project (positive)?
  • What could I have done differently?
  • Who can I learn from?
  • What will I do next?

Admit, Accept, Reframe & Learn.

View challenges as opportunities

The biggest challenge here is choosing your attitude.

When faced with something new, do you get excited or do you feel flustered and stressed?

Opportunities offer self-improvement, learning and growth.

Imagine all the new possibilities that could arise from stretching yourself and saying “yes” to things that

Taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture can help you put the challenge you face into perspective – 10 times out of 10, after having a moment to reflect, the challenge doesn’t look so grand!

Ask yourself the right questions:

  • How will I grow personally & professionally from this opportunity?
  • What other opportunities will come from this?
  • What could I miss out on if I don’t take this opportunity?

Get uncomfortable and see your growth!

Stop seeking approval

As equally imperfect humans, we all naturally share an instinctive need to connect with people.

Navigating the workplace can feel like a jungle sometimes but if you ever start to change or downplay your point of view to appease your boss or teammates, compliment colleagues work – even if you don’t mean it?

Always say yes to requests for your time, even if it means compromising your professional (and sometimes personal) boundaries?

Trying to please your boss, clients or co-workers (by working long hours or striving for non-stop perfection can lead to burnout and unhappiness at work AND in your personal life.

But striking the balance between agreeable and productive team player vs approval-seeking (and daring to make smaller to appease others) is imperative and straight-up mental, emotional, physical and spiritual self-care.

It totally makes sense why we have a need to fit in. Research has shown that rejection activates the same pain pathways of the brain, so when you feel rejected or like you “don’t quite fit in”, that’s why “rejection” hurts. There is nothing wrong with you.

Stop comparing yourself to others, you are your own competition and unique.

How boring a world would it be if we all looked, sounded and thought the same.

Trusting yourself, developing a greater sense of self-worth and always remembering who you are and what you have to offer – You were hired for a VERY GOOD REASON – will keep your positive mindset on track.

Ask yourself the right questions:

  • Where does this need for approval come from?
  • How does comparing myself to others help me?
  • How can I learn to trust in myself, value, skills and experience?

You are NOT in competition with anyone!

Focus on the solution

If your overthinking is caused by real stress at work, reconsider your career path. What do you really want?

If you are not where you want to be in your career, set goals for yourself so that you can get there. Visualise it, hear it, feel it, write them down.

If you feel like your career is out of control, make a decision today to get off auto-pilot and back in control.

Never forget you have freedom of CHOICE.

You have the skills, experience, passion, resources and options. All of these things give you the power to make real CHANGE.

You are ALIVE and HEALTHY and ABLE.

No one controls your reality but you.

Ask yourself the right questions:

  • What, specifically, is the problem?
  • If I create stillness and listen to my heart & gut, what is the next step?
  • What skills and resources do I have that can help me?
  • What have I done in a similar situation in the past to overcome this situation?
  • What can I do right now, to get started?

You CAN control the outcome!

I hope you find these tools useful to break the cycle of a fixed mindset.

Remember, we are all equal and it takes practice to build more mindful habits to develop a growth mindset, but we can all achieve it!

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Thank you Monique for this wonderful guest post on developing a growth mindset.

Developing a growth mindset

Monique Jordan-Cave

Founder Jordan Cave Coaching